Charlie Sheen gets fired from Rainbow Bridge

My friend Charlie Sheen got fired from Rainbow Bridge today. Earnest did the firing. He told him to leave right then and there without even finishing his shift - although he was paid for it. The turnover rate is pretty high at this corporate minded health food store. I've seen many folks come and go. A lot of them quit because it is pure slave wage - others get fired e.g. for giving someone free tea. Then, there's the story of a manager who was fired because he did not always honor the policy of calling the police on banned customers. About 3 years or so ago, a certain friend of mine, with (at least I'll admit) several psychotic tendencies was banned for life. So, this one manager, fell prey to her wily manipulations and let her in the store one too many times - BAM! You’re out of here! Get out of my face! Thus, when I overheard one of the deli girls asking if he (Charlie) had been fired, my drama radar immediately was triggered. I waved him over; he looked at me, held my gaze and signaled for me to wait my holding up one finger.

A few minutes later, Charlie comes over and tells me his story. This is kind of a Bardo Surfer exclusive and it's all free... what's the catch? I don't know... yet!

BS: "What happened why'd you get fired?"

Charlie: "It wasn't any one incident, just a bunch of things adding up."

BS: "Did they get stuff on the surveillance cameras?"

Charlie: Smiles riley, "Yeah."

BS: "Did they bring you up there to watch it?"

Charlie: Smiles, "No, just told me to leave and that I'd get paid for the full day."

BS: "No severance pay?"

Charlie: "No, that's it. Yeah, I have another part time gig but it's not enough... I have two tests tomorrow and so after I take them I'll be able to think about it. Ojai's always been real good to me, anytime I'm stuck and need some money it comes thru so I'm not worried."

BS: "I'm really gonna miss having you and Ray Iota working together."

Charlie: "Yeah, that was part of it, we were having too much fun, things would get a little crazy when we were working together."

So many people go thru that food store. After seven years it starts to get hard to keep track of them all. I don't know, but I feel their needs to be some kind of ceremony when people get fired from Rainbow Bridge. How about they have to walk the plank? If they quit then they get a 1-minute shopping spree in the dark or something.