Free insight
A large object has been found in your living room. Psychologists are at a loss to explain why the object's emotional energy is at times so off-kilter and then suddenly returning to its previous state of serenity.
Researchers, led by Dr. Blue Meany at the University of Yellow Submarines in Los Angeles, California, first spotted the disorder in observations made with their periscope in the waters of the North Shore of Oahu. Since December 2005, they have made follow-up observations that have revealed the object's perplexing path.
Tentatively named Channel Boloney, the object appears to have a perplexing tendency to implode and freak out, appearing to be a monkey and at other times a gorilla depending on your proximity. It lies in a vast ring of icy memories that seem to appear during times of self created stress brought on by competitive triggers. Please note that the triggers have nothing to do with the observed behaviors and only become triggers thru faulty interpretive propensities that have plagued the object for over 3 decades.
Scatter effect
TV has been blamed for scattering many other Channels into tilted paths. But this might only be a scapegoat. It has become a punching bag for all of those trapped within the need to have victims and perpetrators. And we all know that this is just a dualistic illusion which zaps most of us out of the air of free thinking.
Channel B., however, follows a nearly circular path. And it is too distant to have come into direct contact with severe trauma, travelling between 1993 and 1999 around the world. Its orbit is also too circular - and too small - to have been tilted by a passing fad, says Dr. Meany.
These traits make the object, nicknamed "Ringo" after the US television series about an off-centered drummer, hard to explain. "Maybe Ringo is going to be a bit of a paradox," Dr. Meany told Bardo Surfer.
But she suggests one theory that might account for the rocker's strange behavior. It involves a commonly held notion that early in its childhood, it lived in a dream world and did not develop the ability to conform to desired parameters of behavior. Due to the ability to blend in effortlessly, Ringo managed to preserve radical belief systems. Some of them beneficial while others self destructive. Thus, it extended outward and escaped the gravitational attraction of institutionalized biological drives.
Gravitational kick
As it did so, the gravitational reach of imbedded cultural programs extended outwards, as well. This reach comes in the form of drives, or resonances, where an object's orbital cycle happens to be an integral slice of the pie of happiness. So when one of these outward-expanding resonances swept past Ringo, it could have kicked the object out of a fairly circular, flat orbit into a more elongated, tilted one.
Then, over time, the orbit might have grown more circular as the tilt increased. "These interactions can cause some eccentic freaks to circularise and tilt," says Dr. Meany. But she remains cautious: "We don't know if Ringo's orbit really was created in this manner - because it could be too far away from a resonance or the resonance could not be strong enough - but this seems like the best shot."
Penny Lane, a behavioral scientist at the University of Psychotic Misanthropes, says most resonances simply elongate an object's orbit. She says a few objects could "trade off" some of their elongation, or eccentricity, for a higher tilt, but the effect would be small. "I find it hard to see how you would get a large inclination out of a modest eccentricity," Lane told Bardo Surfer. "There's a limit on how much inclination you can trade off."
Rocky Raccoon, a neural scientist at the Primate Research Institute in Boulder, Colorado, says he and others have produced objects like Ringo using models of such special resonances. "However, I do have some problems with the idea," he admits.
Hidden objects
He points out that this object was found when it happened to be surfing through some crazy double overhead waves - where it spends just 2% of its surf time. That suggests many more such objects remain undiscovered, tilted at orbits where most surveys do not search for them. "I just don't think these mechanisms can deliver that much stuff," Raccoon told Bardo Surfer.
He ventures another possible explanation - that the distressor had a repeater and that both influences remained hidden from eachother but acted in concert to help shape the object.
Dr. Meany and her colleagues will continue to observe the new object to pin down its personality more accurately. And following the convention for identifying eccentric freaks in the US, they have suggested several befitting names for the object to the International Blogging Union.
Researchers, led by Dr. Blue Meany at the University of Yellow Submarines in Los Angeles, California, first spotted the disorder in observations made with their periscope in the waters of the North Shore of Oahu. Since December 2005, they have made follow-up observations that have revealed the object's perplexing path.
Tentatively named Channel Boloney, the object appears to have a perplexing tendency to implode and freak out, appearing to be a monkey and at other times a gorilla depending on your proximity. It lies in a vast ring of icy memories that seem to appear during times of self created stress brought on by competitive triggers. Please note that the triggers have nothing to do with the observed behaviors and only become triggers thru faulty interpretive propensities that have plagued the object for over 3 decades.
Scatter effect
TV has been blamed for scattering many other Channels into tilted paths. But this might only be a scapegoat. It has become a punching bag for all of those trapped within the need to have victims and perpetrators. And we all know that this is just a dualistic illusion which zaps most of us out of the air of free thinking.
Channel B., however, follows a nearly circular path. And it is too distant to have come into direct contact with severe trauma, travelling between 1993 and 1999 around the world. Its orbit is also too circular - and too small - to have been tilted by a passing fad, says Dr. Meany.
These traits make the object, nicknamed "Ringo" after the US television series about an off-centered drummer, hard to explain. "Maybe Ringo is going to be a bit of a paradox," Dr. Meany told Bardo Surfer.
But she suggests one theory that might account for the rocker's strange behavior. It involves a commonly held notion that early in its childhood, it lived in a dream world and did not develop the ability to conform to desired parameters of behavior. Due to the ability to blend in effortlessly, Ringo managed to preserve radical belief systems. Some of them beneficial while others self destructive. Thus, it extended outward and escaped the gravitational attraction of institutionalized biological drives.
Gravitational kick
As it did so, the gravitational reach of imbedded cultural programs extended outwards, as well. This reach comes in the form of drives, or resonances, where an object's orbital cycle happens to be an integral slice of the pie of happiness. So when one of these outward-expanding resonances swept past Ringo, it could have kicked the object out of a fairly circular, flat orbit into a more elongated, tilted one.
Then, over time, the orbit might have grown more circular as the tilt increased. "These interactions can cause some eccentic freaks to circularise and tilt," says Dr. Meany. But she remains cautious: "We don't know if Ringo's orbit really was created in this manner - because it could be too far away from a resonance or the resonance could not be strong enough - but this seems like the best shot."
Penny Lane, a behavioral scientist at the University of Psychotic Misanthropes, says most resonances simply elongate an object's orbit. She says a few objects could "trade off" some of their elongation, or eccentricity, for a higher tilt, but the effect would be small. "I find it hard to see how you would get a large inclination out of a modest eccentricity," Lane told Bardo Surfer. "There's a limit on how much inclination you can trade off."
Rocky Raccoon, a neural scientist at the Primate Research Institute in Boulder, Colorado, says he and others have produced objects like Ringo using models of such special resonances. "However, I do have some problems with the idea," he admits.
Hidden objects
He points out that this object was found when it happened to be surfing through some crazy double overhead waves - where it spends just 2% of its surf time. That suggests many more such objects remain undiscovered, tilted at orbits where most surveys do not search for them. "I just don't think these mechanisms can deliver that much stuff," Raccoon told Bardo Surfer.
He ventures another possible explanation - that the distressor had a repeater and that both influences remained hidden from eachother but acted in concert to help shape the object.
Dr. Meany and her colleagues will continue to observe the new object to pin down its personality more accurately. And following the convention for identifying eccentric freaks in the US, they have suggested several befitting names for the object to the International Blogging Union.
posted by Dij at 12:10 AM
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