Release

[Wednesday October 24, 2002, Kauai]

Spent Wednesday driving South to a beach on the other side of Pa'i. Very powerful emotionally compressed day. Immersed in grief, sadness; tears squeezed out. Felt like I was going crazy. Couldn't pin point why just unchecked emotion that must have been pent up and now it's finally releasing enmasse.

Went to a beach with white hot sand which burnt the souls of my feet. The waves were pretty big and strong. The current was crazy rippin. I swam out and body surfed, a bit surprised how gentle the ride was. The waves tried to suck me back out. I came back in and ate avacado spread on brown rice cakes, watching the waves. There were couples on either side. They'd go in to the water in pairs. The man out 10 feet further than the woman. The man, round with too much fat and the woman somewhat fitter but still to much jiggle in the butt. One guy floated around on a boogey board, unable to catch a wave, just floundering around in the frothy white wake while his skin reddened slowly in the bright sun. His lobster red less red than it could have been thanks to big white clouds marching across the sky propelled by a fierce wind.